(via redlotad)

(via rlmjob)

I'm a girl but I want to try anal, is that weird?

Who am i?? The anal police??

Ok im going to buy asparagus tempura for lunch before work whos with me


*wakes up* what the fuck

(via melongorl)


A guy once told my lesbian friend that being a lesbian is a huge turn off for guys and that she’ll never find a boyfriend.

(via barack-obottm)


it must get annoying living in the south with all those banjos constantly playing 

(via barack-obottm)


nerd: touch my butt and buy me pizza
me: fuck my ass and pay for all my groceries

(via hilloween)


Girl: Come over

Me: Im an AP student, and I take many AP classes

Girl: My parents arent home

Me: AP stands for advanced placement. These are college level courses that you can take in high school. Typically they are more demanding than regular classes and thus you are often given a higher workload. However, the benefits are far reaching. Consider taking some AP courses during high school for a chance to earn college credit

(via beyoncevevo)

hey i know how much you love reading and i just recently finished my favorite book again and thought i'd recommend it to you just in case you get bored and want something to read, but its called The Reader by Bernhard Schlink and it's great. It's a psychological and emotional period piece

Ill check it out, i added it to my book list 😊

A series of unfortunate events will always be one of my favorite series’ bc i learned cinnamon tastes good with hot chocolate bc of it



What if your giving a bj in the shower and he just starts shampooing and conditioning your hair 

very polite

(via kwikemart)


i thought i had a crush!! but it turned out to just be a 2 day long infatuation where i was actually just bored

(via malikmydick)